Trouble with the Police in Thailand — Travel with the Allens

Some folks like to follow the rules meticulously. Some folks stay on pre-arranged, carefully designated paths and tours. There is nothing wrong with these principles or the people that adhere to them. I'm just not one of those folks... and sometimes it leads to problems.

Travel is all about the thrill of new adventures for me. And food.... And wine. And people. Okay so there's a few reasons we travel, but the point is this: I want you to hear the good, the bad, and the ugly or peculiar, as the case may be.

Moments before our terrible realization, South Gate, Chiang Mai

I rolled Liz out of bed early on our third morning in Chiang Mai and prepped the necessary coffee I.V. to bring my wife and partner-in-crime out of hibernation. Once we resembled human beings we hopped on the lovely little moped we rented the previous morning and sped out onto the still quiet streets of Chiang Mai as the sun rose.

We were up with the sun to experience the morning market at the South Gate of the old city. Liz and I had enjoyed the sights, sounds, and (most of the) smells in the same spot on our first evening in Chiang Mai, but the night markets tend to cater more towards vacationers, if not tourists. When we learned that the South Gate was also where many local restaurant owners purchased all of their daily supplies early in the morning I knew we had to see it in full swing.

I brought my overpowered 50lb moped to a halt in a line of similar vehicles, locked up our helmets and took Liz by the hand through the market. The South Gate Market in the morning hours is a must-see (I'll include a link after I write about it - you guys know we love markets). Unfortunately, after an hour or so of ogling strange foods and wares and eating some mystery breakfast noodles out of a bag, we came back to the mop....The moped. Our rental vehicle had been wrapped in chains and secured with a padlock bearing the Chiang Mai government seal. There was also a ticket wedged between the left handle and brake lever.

Dammit.

As it turns out, the spot in which we had parked was a 10 minute loading zone beginning about 30 minutes after we arrived. I could have know this, but my spoken Thai isn't exactly conversational and my written Thai, nonexistent. From that moment, everything that followed was a flurry of commotion, half-understood pantomime, defeat, uniforms, and victory. I would not necessarily recommend following in my footsteps on this one...

I gained my first foothold on the path to resolution by communicating to the nearest vendor that I had no idea what to do. This guy, a massive man by Thai standards, got through to me that I needed to go to the local jail. Before I could even finish processing that a Thai prison was not a place I wanted to visit, Big Guy flagged down a Tuk Tuk driver he knew and told me to get in and go to jail. Fortunately, my next decision was made for me.

My internal dialogue progressed to deciding which was the most desperately irresponsible of my options: (1) Take my wife to the Jail with me; or (2) leave my wife standing alone in a market in Chiang Mai. Before I could make a decision however, Big Guy, got through to me that someone had to stay so the police could unlock the moped. I handed Liz my phone and jumped aboard the Tuk Tuk.

On the breakneck ride to the jail, I shoved all of the terrible possible outcomes out of my head and focused on my game plan: Give in to feeling embarrassed and nervous. Show extreme deference to everyone I meet. Pray for the best.

I basically bowed my way into the administrative office which, to my pleasant surprise, did more closely resemble a police station than some creepy Thai jail (whatever you would imagine that to look like). At the mercy of the police on duty, I showed them the ticket and kept repeating that I was very sorry and would pay more attention next time. As the officers talked amongst themselves the stern glares gave way to the reassuring Thai smiles you see everywhere. They stamped my ticket as paid, took no money, and called something over the radio before effectively pushing me out the door. There in the driveway another surprise awaited me - the Tuk Tuk driver that delivered me was waiting to take me back. The ride back was no less bumpy, but it started to sink in that everything was going to be fine. The Tuk Tuk driver followed the authorities' lead and did not charge me for either conveyance and, upon returning to the market, I found Liz safely waiting for me as Big Guy kept watch over my wife and our moped.

I gained a couple grey hairs that morning and lost about an hour of my day, but also came away with something else: A new respect for the unwavering kindness of most locals in Chiang Mai. Oh... And maybe a new respect for street signs and parking rules.

Pay attention out there, people! Don't be that inconsiderate moped-parker that throws off everyone's day. If you want to hear more about this experience or others from our travels, shoot me an email at travelwiththeallens@gmail.com

With gratitude,

Brooks